I remember walking into a crowded room where people gathered to see a prominent spiritual teacher make an appearance. I heard the whispers, I saw how excited his students felt. When he showed up, I watched people hang on to every word he said.

It was then I realized that I felt uncomfortable at seeing followers treat teachers as if they were deities. There was something unhealthy in the air.

For some people, following a teacher can unintentionally reinforce patterns of self abandonment, powerlessness or codependency. Sometimes people willingly give their power away simply because they have never been shown what it feels like to stand in their own. Some remain in victimhood, looking for someone to rescue them.

The more our energy is wrapped up in following someone else, the easier it becomes to drift away from our own authentic path.

The more we lean into the teacher, the less we see or recognize that we are guided from within and I’ve observed how some teachers, perhaps unconsciously, draw energy from their students’ projections.

Over the years I also began to notice another pattern in my own spiritual journey. Many of the teachers I was learning from were primarily white male figures of authority. Without realizing it, I trusted that form of authority more readily than others.

When I looked deeper, I discovered something uncomfortable: somewhere in my unconscious I held a mistrust of the feminine, both outside of me and within me.

Seeing this was frightening.

I realized I no longer wanted to see teachers as white male figures of authority whom I placed above myself. I no longer wanted to give my attention, my energy, my money, or my authority to someone I had elevated in that way.

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Be well.

Warmly,

Gayane Kulikyan